9 months of accomplishment

There were times I thought I'd never get to the point where I am now. There were times I did not thing it was possible to achieve my goals. I know people to take everything one day at a time. I say it all the time. I know that my once jumbo muffin tops are now shrinking slowly into more of a regular muffin look almost mini muffin compared to a long time ago. The nice full trademark cheeks are now shrinking to nice defined cheek bones. Those curves I've always had are becoming beautiful curves not lumps. I know, I may sound kind of harsh. I'm usually not this harsh about myself. Yes I know I haven't always loved everything about myself, but I've ALWAYS been confident about what I did have.

Nine months ago I achieved my second Life long dream, To be a mother. I could not have asked for any better gift from God then to bring in a lovely child of God. he is beautiful in every way and really reminds me to stop, slow down, and enjoy the simple things in life. My third dream was to look the way I've always felt. Not just for health but for myself. I've been slowly working towards my goal. There has been a weight hurdle I have never been able to jump under as long as I remember. about five months ago I really got serious about this weight loss thing. I thought I guess now is a good time as any. Nursing does really help me out. I was doing really well. Being pregnant I reached a weight number I NEVER wanted to get to. I never wanted to be near that number ever in my life. I accepted it. It's done. It's over. Never again.

I planned on doing weight watchers by myself with motivation from my sister and good friend. They have helped me keep going. I have made small changes in my diet and that has really improved things. Christmas time was a happy yet frustrating time for me. I was excited to celebrate my baby bear's very first christmas. Our first christmas as parents, as a Family. It was also our first christmas in our very own home. It was a quiet and peacefull first Christmas. Much joy to be had. The problem was ALL the junk food brought into the house. I really was frustrated because my will power was at a low point and I just love my mom's puppy chow. After chrismas I thought I did pretty well for how much junk and food I had been eating. I stepped on that scale. Christmas had put me 10 lbs back. I thought ok, it could be worse. I gave myself permission to have that little food joy. I got back on track with everything. Then recently I tried the scale once again. I told myself I would be ok if I hadn't lost anything, BUT I had hoped for maybe at least 5 lbs gone. I had been working hard to lose some. Wow. Was I EVER wrong. I not only lost the ten pounds I love MORE!!!!!!! I had officially hurdled my last weight hurdle.

I am proud to say I am now at my lowest weight ever. You know I use to have a hard time saying where I was. I will never fully tell how much I weighed at my highest during pregnancy, but I will say it now and be proud. I have never been under 200lbs. I remember I would always hover right around or above, never under. Well I'm excited to say I busted through it I'm now over 10lbs UNDER. I am so happy. Now I can work to truly feel like the person I've always envisioned in my head.

A few friends have asked where I want to go from here. My answer is I don't know. I will set a goal of another 40 lbs. I will see how I feel and look then. I by no means ever want to be twig like, nor does my husband want me to be. I really want to be a curvy woman. I love the full look of a pin up woman. I've told myself once I get to my goal a bouidior pin up photo session is in order for me to show it off for my husband and myself.

Pounds lost to date: 90 lbs
Pounds left to go : 40 lbs

I realize the only person who can make me work for this is myself. I do this not because society tells me I need to look a certain way. I do this because I want to look like the woman I've always drempt I was. I will not be ashamed for that. I will give an update at various points.

love.